UNDERSTANDING MEN? The nice men are ugly. The handsome men are not nice. The handsome and nice men are gay. The handsome, nice, and heterosexual men are married. The men who are not so handsome but are nice men have no money. The men who are not so handsome but are nice men with money think you are only after their money. The handsome men without money are after your money. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think you are beautiful enough. The men who think you are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice, and have money are cowards. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice, and have some money and, thank God, are heterosexual are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!! The men who never make the first move automatically lose interest in you when you take the initiative. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage! Someone once told me that as men age they start to look like Sean Connery. And that as women age, they start to look like Sean Connery. Ladies,make sure that you date someone before that happens, so you can win him over with your charm and personality before you turn into an old fat man.